Thoughts on Breastfeeding

The arrival of The Baby Brother's first tooth hasn't affected our feeding yet but we'll see how it goes, gums are one thing but teeth are much sharper!

When he was born I was given a leaflet about breastfeeding which seemed, to my hormonally charged brain, to say that if it hurt it was because I was doing it wrong. Breastfeeding is hard work and we shouldn't be made to feel inadequate if we give up after 3 days, 3 weeks or 3 months. You must remember that your baby is learning too, just because it is a natural process doesn't mean it's easy. You need to be quite stubborn to get it established I think.

Day 3 was a real low point, hormones crashing, milk coming in, tired and weepy I was sure we'd never get the hang of it. Poor love was trying to latch onto a boob the size of a barrage balloon!

I tried to gather my thoughts and think of what I knew from the other two. If he is crying he can't latch on as his toungue curls back in his mouth. Be realistic, set mini targets - today is Monday, I'll keep trying till Wednesday - so that gradually the first few difficult weeks pass, broken down into smaller stages.

When feeding make sure you are comfy, even a little 6 or 7llb bundle gets heavy after a while, more so if you've had a section. Drink lots, lots and lots. You are making milk which uses a lot of fluid and you don't want to add constipation to your list of woes!

Do your pelvic floor exercises while feeding, you'll be sitting around feeding for ages so get in the habit early on. Yes even when you are tired!

Get Lansinoh for your nipples, expensive but worth it till they toughen up. And muslin squares. Especially if you've got a posseter!

A soggy, messy, leaky body that doesn't feel like yours will settle down to be wonderous, life giving, milk making , baby nourishing. Twee as it sounds try to focus on the positive, how wonderful it is to sit in the still and peaceful night feeding your darling baby. Night feeds will pass, it doesn't help to count how many times you have been up, try to accept being awake even when your body is screaming for sleep. Likewise sleep during the day, you must get some rest and the baby sets the pattern, so sleep when you can.

For the first few weeks the only place The Baby Brother would sleep was lying on my chest, quite right too, having spent months listening to the sound of my heartbeat why would he want to sleep in a lonely cradle. 

The Baby Brother was not great at latching on for quite some time, so we stayed at home where we could both be relaxed and take it at our own pace. I ordered shopping online and spent my time focussing on him....till the big two came home from school. Then it was a case of feeding while learning spellings, times tables and hearing reading.All good but hard in the first few weeks.

We moved to mixed feeding, a few bottles helped my physical recovery from the section and enabled me to get some much needed sleep. It meant I carried on feeding at a point where I felt like giving up and to my mind a half breastfed baby is fine. 

I found some nights incredibly hard, him crying himself into a frenzy, me weeping at my inability to comfort and feed him. Mr FK lying beside me snoring, till I kicked him hard enough to wake him up! Which made me feel a bit better if nothing else! 

Comments

[ginny]

this sounds oh so familiar... especially mr FK snoring and the pleasure you took in waking him up!
a great post.. and well done for persevering despite the c section. breast feeding is not always easy and your description of a baby trying to latch on to a barrage balloon was my experience too. la leche are very good for anyone who has difficulties and i spoke to one la leche councellor who gave me suggestions on how to feed in alternative positions to help with sore nipples and she also gave me great advice on mastitus.

[joanna]

I really enjoyed reading that which sounds really weird( !) but when I had my first son it was all very hard and I expected it to be easy. I had no idea what i was doing but I sort of expected that the baby would. I didn't realise that we both had to learn. Well done you for getting through it all.

[Julie]

Been there, I nursed five babies! But I never used bottles I just found them to much work. When they got teeth and they would try and bite me I would do as the indian women would do and that was the flick them on the check and they would stop and before long they never did it again.

[Lisa]

With one week to go until "the bean" arrives and planning on breast feeding, I shall remind myself of this post on day three when I have mammoth boobs!

L xx

[Lesley]

This is a great post Jo. I found breast feeding incredibly hard with my two and hated being told I must be doing something wrong.
I persevered with Monster and fed him for eight months. Minx was a whole different ball game - not helped by her brother only being 17 months old when she was born - and I put her on bottles at two weeks. She's nearly nine (years) now and I still wish I could go back and try again!
You are doing such a fantastic job with Baby Brother and you are an inspiration for breastfeeding Mums everywhere :)

xxx

[Ali]

Your post brought back so many memories. Not least the feeling of totally alien boobs. Now, some 9 years after, I still am mystified that my body DID such a thing.

[ClaireP]

Lovely post. i remember mammoth boobs! still wake up with one huge one ever now and then if the munchkin manages to go through the night (not very often!). didn't have any problems to start with but now starting to feel so incredibly tired and thinking of introducing some formula so i can sleep :)
Hubby also snores away every night while i feed.

[Jo]

Gosh I had that day 3 myself, with a midwife either side of me, while I sat, globular boobs out, tears streaming down my face. The glamourous side of learning to nurse it was not...The nights are the hardest, and sometimes it feels so relentless (which it is) but to look at him and think that he's alive, and growing, and all because of those boobs - well, that's quite something.

[angelina]

This is a fantastic post. Breastfeeding is the ideal way to feed a baby if everything's working right but it's awful to make any woman feel that if she's having trouble getting her baby to latch on then it's her fault. It's also horrible to make any woman feel she's failed if she can't, for any reason, breastfeed completely or at all. I have a friend who didn't produce enough milk and it was so stressful for her- she really felt she'd failed as a mom. That's such a harsh thing. Everyone has to do their best and forgive themselves if they don't reach their own expectations.

I almost quit at three weeks. Got the whole cracked nipple thing going and Max had some trouble latching on anytime he got fussy. Somehow we got over the three week mark and continued on for a year.

[Frugal Trenches]

Such a great post! I think many people don't know or understand it will be work. Well done you for sticking through it all!

[www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1563729737]

Great post that shows a new mum its not always as easy as you think to begin with but worth it in teh long run x